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  • Kimberly Hula 10:48 am on February 23, 2016 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , dental fear, dentist, dentophobia, needle fear, needle phobia, odontophobia, overcoming fears, trauma, trust, trypanophobia, xanax   

    “A man that flies from his fear may find that he has only taken a short cut to meet it.” 

    “He folded his fear into a perfect rose. He held it out in the palm of his hand. She took it from him and put it in her hair.”
    ― Arundhati Roy, The God of Small Things

    You can run a search on the word “fear” and find it peppered throughout this blog.  What is a year of adventure if not a campaign to conquer fear?  Note: this is not a complaint: For someone who proclaims to be afraid of everything this attitude can only help.  Fear is but a trick of the mind, right?  And I’ve celebrated fantastic victories.  I’ve battled fear!  Defeated fear!  I’ve committed to quiet asides with fear, and went so far as to share certain fears.  To be FAIR (get it?!) I’m a stronger woman for it, and I feel forever changed.  But, through it all I’ve been selective.  You see, skydiving and trapeze swinging and frozen baptisms all feel like childs play in comparison to the one pursuit I’ve kept at bay.  Because now, inevitably and begrudgingly, I’ve found myself in the place I fear the most:

    Dear reader, I had to visit the dentist.40435_897073625260_1968649_n

    Please understand that I’m not in the habit of admonishing dentists.  In fact, if I’m to be honest, the only dentists I’ve known have been lovely – leaving me trauma-free, and smile ready.  So why the ire?  Why do I consider this THE FEAR of ALL FEARS?  And when I say FEAR I am not in jest.  Think sleepless nights and mid-day panic.  Think expertly chewed nails and avoidance for a long, long time.  I’m ashamed to admit 6 years too long.  All for a profession that has only ever been kind to me in the past.

    I mean it when I say that it’s me, not them.

    That’s because this doesn’t have to do with dentists, and has everything to do with needles.   (More …)

     

    • eatveggiesdrinkwine 9:42 am on April 16, 2016 Permalink

      Congratulations, Kimberly! I know this fear and avoidance intimately, so I am doubly impressed with your courage. Practicing yoga and meditation is what helped me to finally stop bursting into tears at a doctor’s mere mention of needle-work. I still don’t love it, but I can deal with it now. I have also learned to appreciate the silver lining of this fear — I’m never going to get a tattoo that I’ll regret later.

  • Kimberly Hula 7:27 am on February 22, 2016 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: 2/52, 2016 Walt Disney World marathon, 26.2 miles, , redemption,   

    “You must give everything to make your life as beautiful as the dreams that dance in your imagination.” 

    “The miracle isn’t that I finished. The miracle is that I had the courage to start.”
    ― John Bingham, No Need for Speed: A Beginner’s Guide to the Joy of Running

    2016 may seem to some like a bit of a paradox.  Here we have an encore of 2010 – a resolve to commit to a year of adventures so as to broaden our exposure to the world and challenge our inhibitions.  It’s a vast scope of work and one could argue that there are limitless adventures to undertake.  So why, in a world of such potential, would I elect to do something I’ve already done?

    12540870_10103628520318000_361795023563503039_nI haven’t defined an adventure because each experience is unique to the individual.  One man’s ‘been there, done that‘ is another’s worst fear confirmed.  Even more, I’m an adventuring one-hit wonder.  Despite my best efforts I can never replicate an experience.  The set up, the sensation, the reflection, all changes.  While this helps keep life spicy (see: experience, spice of life), it also comes at a cost.  You see, I think fondly on my past year of adventure.  Sometimes I’d do just about anything to feel as unencumbered as free as I did when I first jumped out of a plane, or spoke into a microphone, or fell in love.  These are the memories we’d sooner remake, so it was with some trepidation that I embarked on Adventure #2, and ran my first marathon in 11 years.

    (More …)

     

  • kittycurry 11:13 pm on February 18, 2016 Permalink | Reply  

    I’m My Own Knight in Shining Armor 

    I generally don’t have a tough time shining a light on myself, but there was definitely something unnerving about posting my poetry all over town.

    Poetry_3It was a writing practice, most of all, as first I’d have to actually write something, but it was also the ultimate test of self-assuredness: Releasing an intimate piece of myself out into the world and not being able to control or even know how it was received – like swimming in the iddle of a dark, vast ocean, not knowing what might be lurking, or like being an amateur porn star, not knowing who in your life might see your …. I think you get the point – and maintaining a healthy sense of self anyway. Not with the flick of an ego-driven “just don’t give a fuck,” but with an open heart to potential judgment and yet an unwavering willingness to have your own back.

    It’s not necessary to whip out your entire soul and flaunt it everywhere you go just to test this, but on the other hand, restraining and hiding parts of yourself out of fear of judgment is an exercise in d
    ying. I want to live – and nothing personal, but not for you and your opinion of me.

    Most of my best writing comes in a flash, so, despite having ignored her for awhile, I grabbed ahold of my muse next came she around and fervently wrote things down before they escaped without record. I probably should dote on my babies a bit more, coddle and nurture them, but I’m just not that kind of girl. I let my words hang loose on a page, and that’s usually pretty close to the final version. Here and there, I dawdle on finding the perfect word and placement, but it’s more or less exactly what came out of me in the first place.
    (More …)

     

    • eatveggiesdrinkwine 9:50 am on April 16, 2016 Permalink

      I love this adventure and your writing. I would be thrilled to randomly see your poetry on a lamppost. And I think I might hang these sentences somewhere I can read them daily: “[R]estraining and hiding parts of yourself out of fear of judgment is an exercise in dying. I want to live – and nothing personal, but not for you and your opinion of me.” Perfection! Thank you for adventuring and sharing.

  • kittycurry 6:07 pm on January 30, 2016 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: 2/52   

    BOS->BOM Part 1 

    IMG_0037I went to India the second week of January for work. My colleague, a videographer, and I, a writer, were there to cover a water desalination device developed at our university and its impact on the lives of villagers in rural India, where electricity and money and clean water are all hard to come by.

    It doesn’t sound scary, I know, but I have to admit I was a little nervous. For one, I would be away from my daughter for almost two weeks.

    Two, I was going to a developing country, a first for me. I’ve traveled to well developed countries like England, Iceland, Italy, and France, but never anything like this. I really had no idea what I should be prepared to see or feel. All I knew was that apparently I was going to stand out, I should bring my own toilet paper, I’d probably get ill, and I owned zero appropriate clothing.

    Three, I was going on a work trip, so, while I was traveling with a co-worker and wouldn’t technically be on my own, in a way I was going alone — another first for me.

    Four, we weren’t going as tourists, meandering around big cities to see the sights and shop and eat our hearts out – we were going to mostly small, poor villages that lack basic amenities like 24-hour electricity and clean water. Did I mention how long the flights were? Oh, and I would be practicing a type of extended in-the-field journalism that I had never done before, getting nice and cozy with subjects and environments that were quite different from anything I’ve ever known.

    Talk about moving outside your comfort zone. I didn’t know if I’d get there and burst with joy from experiencing so many new things all at once, or start crying and maybe vomit from the shock and horror of it all. It really was a toss-up.

    Nevertheless, I was excited. (More …)

     

  • Kimberly Hula 9:41 am on January 30, 2016 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: clean slate, never, not, regrets   

    “Never look back unless you are planning to go that way” 

    “Never look back unless you are planning to go that way.” – Henry David Thoreau

     

  • kittycurry 10:18 pm on January 5, 2016 Permalink | Reply  

    Dip in to a Sea of Possibilities 

    Polar Bear Plunge_2015I stood there, numb.

    Not emotionally numb. Physically numb. That shit was freezing cold.

    In the course of telling me about her idea of 52 adventures for the first time, Kim mentioned taking part in a Polar Bear Plunge, and I knew instinctively she would ask me to do it. How could she not? It was karma. It was my worst fear. I won’t even dip into the ocean on the warmest summer beach day. I prefer near-bath-water temperatures myself.

    I cringed internally and hoped to God I was wrong.

    I wasn’t. She texted me one night and said, casually, as if it were no big thing, “Wanna do the Polar Bear Plunge?”

    Shit.

    I couldn’t answer. I pretended not to see the text. Maybe she’ll think it wasn’t delivered, I thought.

    She asked again a couple of days later. “I’m not sure,” I finally said.

    “Let’s discuss it in person,” she said. “I’ll convince you.” “We’ll see,” I replied.

    We met up for drinks at a local bar. We drank wine and talked excitedly about many things, and for a little while there, I thought I was home free.

    Wrong again.

    “I really think you should do the plunge,” she started. “It’s a great way to begin a year of 52 adventures. It’s very symbolic of a rebirth, a washing away of your past self. It’s very refreshing.”

    I was scared shitless, but I knew I had no defense. This was the whole point of 52 adventures: to force yourself out of your comfort zone, to confront your deepest fears, to prove to your irrational side that you can do anything, that the only thing to fear is fear itself, and that discomfort, whether physical or emotional, won’t kill you. It will empower you. Invigorate you. It will allow you to bust through whatever walls you’ve built around yourself that are preventing you from living the full, boundary-less, bullshit-less life you know full well you would have if you could just get rid of all this baggage that’s been growing around you, slowly, sneakily, so that it actually took you quite a long time to even notice it was there.

    No, fuck that.

    “Of course I’m going to do it,” I blurted out, before my weaker side had a chance to protest.

    I thought about the idea of a rebirth, and I liked it, but for some reason it didn’t quite resonate with me. But then I remembered one of my favorite Patti Smith songs, “Land.” I’ve always loved the line, “Dip in to the sea of possibilities,” and I realized what the plunge would mean to me, and that gave me the strength I needed. I was actually looking forward to it now. I’m going to literally and figuratively dip in to the sea of possibilities!

    And that’s exactly what I did first thing in the morning on January 1, 2016.

    Well, actually, I didn’t dip. I ran into Dorchester Bay. For one moment, I stood there, numb. But then I jumped up and down and waved my hands around wildly. And it was awesome. And it was beautiful. And it didn’t hurt.

    Here’s to a year of running into a sea of possibilities!

     

    -Alissa Mallinson

     

    • Kimberly Hula 10:37 pm on January 5, 2016 Permalink

      Congratulations lady! I’m digging Patti Smith as a source of inspiration. Can’t wait to see what you do next!

    • abstractangel7 8:46 pm on January 6, 2016 Permalink

      Wow, I admire you both but this is something I don’t think I could ever do! I get cold just thinking about it. You are both so brave!!!

    • eatveggiesdrinkwine 1:45 pm on January 10, 2016 Permalink

      Yes, so brave — way to go!

  • Kimberly Hula 3:20 pm on January 4, 2016 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , Albert Camus, awakening, Lake Ontario, , raymond carver, remake, reuinon   

    In the depth of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer. 

    “They had laughed. They had leaned on each other and laughed until the tears had come, while everything else–the cold, and where he’d go in it–was outside, for a while anyway.”
    ― Raymond Carver, What We Talk About When We Talk About Love

    1003397_10156378892700284_14679645118229807_n

    SPOILER (?): If you are a Star Wars purist who somehow hasn’t seen the newest installation, don’t read on lest I SPOIL something for you.  In all honesty, what I’m soon to say isn’t so much a spoil as a near expiration but I thought I’d forewarn you nonetheless. (More …)

     

  • abstractangel7 12:44 pm on January 4, 2016 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , friendship, life   

    Hi, fellow adventurers! I thought it would be helpful if we began with some introductions (or re-introductions). I just read my posts from 2010- wow, time flies! I found them hilarious. They brought back some great memories.

    For those of you who don’t know me, I am 33 and the mom of two boys, ages 10 and 12. I’m a self-professed travel addict who loves randomness, nature, and tries not to take life too seriously. My day job is as a therapist (LPC, CADC) in a supportive-living facility on the Southside of Chicago.

    This blog inspired me to continue making short-term “bucket lists” of things I wanted to do and accomplish. My list for 2015 included:

    *Buy a car
    *Drive for Uber/Lyft
    *Visit at least 1 foreign country (Two! Spain and Turkey)
    *Take the boys to visit at least 1 new state (12!!)
    *Try LSD (that’s another story, lol)
    *Take a trapeze class
    *Take a swing dancing class (it became my new monthly hobby!)
    *Take the kids on their first horseback ride
    *Bring Jake to visit a dairy and pig farm (it ended up being a pre-factory farm. oops!! lol)
    *Run my first 5k
    *Live with a roommate (previously I’d only lived with my ex-husband and sister)
    *Join the Red Cross Disaster Action Team

    Last year was a mixture of emotions for me. I dated a bit but stayed intentionally single, trying to work on myself as much as possible after a devastating break-up near the end of 2014. I feel like I’ve grown spiritually, gained confidence and clarity in my identity and passions, and am redefining what “adventure” will look like for me in the coming year. (More …)

     

    • Kimberly Hula 2:54 pm on January 4, 2016 Permalink

      So glad to have you on board! Can’t wait to see all that 2016 has in store for us!

    • eatveggiesdrinkwine 1:41 pm on January 10, 2016 Permalink

      Thanks for the reintroduction! I love what you did in 2015 and your plans for this year. ! I re-read my 2010 adventures recently, and it was a great way to reminisce and to get re-inspired.

  • Kimberly Hula 10:12 am on January 3, 2016 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: "Everything was beautiful and nothing hurt", , Kurt Vonnegut, year of adventure   

    Everything is beautiful, and nothing hurts 

    I take liberties with the subject heading: “Everything is beautiful, and nothing hurts.” If I’m to stay true to the original (and perform consideration citation!) I should say, “everything was beautiful and nothing hurt.”  So said Kurt Vonnegut, and by proxy the Tralfamadors as they attempt to destroy the earth in Slaughter House Five (or Children’s Crusade dependent on your title allegiance).  It may seem silly to quibble over tenses, but I’ll argue quite the opposite.  There is a quiet danger to disregarding your tenses.  There is a tension to every pull of every year.  And while I’d never advocate against reflection and nostalgia, it’s my aim to promote the possibility of the future.  That’s why I’m here.  And, essentially, that’s why I just can’t quit adventuring.

    I don’t think I’ll make friends with the subject heading alone.  Some things are not beautiful.  Some things really do hurt.  It would be easier to adhere to the true quote and think of beauty in past tense.  Can I see through the piss and shit of the past and find beauty in it?  Sure, of course – it’s over and hindsight is a lovely trick of the mind.  Can I sit in the pain of the present and find the same semblance of beauty?  Now that’s a tall order.

    I’m a runner.  Of roads, yes, but also of life.  Of my past and my present.  I’ve convinced myself that my future is a product of my own making and that wealth and prosperity and love will be found in it if only I impel myself to move.  There’s nothing wrong with working toward a better tomorrow, but there is something scary in not attending to your present.  Was, is, will: they are conjugations with real consequences.  For me, I need a reminder of the beauty that is around me.  I need to stand still and take in my surroundings.  Revel a little – unravel a lot.  I know that life isn’t a screen print of sunshine and roses.  But if I apply basic science I can find a reaction in every action.  I can find beauty in certain hurt.  I can give this year a light I might not have otherwise been able to see.

    I hope you’ll join me.  Your adventures can be loud (see: singing in the subway; riding a roller coaster), or soft (letters to loved ones; letting something you love go).  They can be intimate or shared.  They can be in response to your past or in hope of your future.  Whatever the case, make it your case.  Do whatever you need to do to remind yourself of just how beautiful you are, and that the world, with you in it, hurts a hell of a lot less.

    Thanks for joining me.  Community like this – and weekly reminders like these – really reaffirm the notion that everything is beautiful, and nothing hurts.

    Go forth and adventure you crazy lot, you, and keep doing what you’re doing.  You do it so well!

     

    • eatveggiesdrinkwine 1:32 pm on January 10, 2016 Permalink

      Kim, I love this! It’s so good to receive another invitation to live fully this year by the original adventurer!

    • Kimberly Hula 11:08 am on January 13, 2016 Permalink

      Will you be joining us again this year?!?!

  • barrettje 5:29 pm on December 31, 2014 Permalink | Reply  

    A Year of Adventure Has Begun 

    a-year-of-adventure-has-begun

     

    • Kimberly Hula 4:45 pm on January 22, 2015 Permalink

      So glad to hear of it! I’m in, too! Please post your progress!

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